been a while..

Its been ages since I've been on here so this is going to be a long one!!
I don't know whats wrong with my lately I don't have a good reason to feel down, but I do , I mean looking at this charity thing in school and so many people have it bad! I have a loving family, a house, food, good school even though I moan, a good boyfriend and friends, but yet i still feel meh! I could be in a crowd of people and still feel so lonely. Today was the worst for it, some people noticed some didn't, i don't feel like im there and daze off into my own world all the time"
Alika has made my day as she wants me to go to her BBQ tomorrow but i cant :( but its nice to know im wanted! love her <3
Its bad because before i started opening up to Ross more and more and was really making progress, but lately im closing up again and i havent told him soooo much :( the thing is i want to, but i can never bring it up, i was going to tell him earlier but he texted me right before work how are you? im not exactly going to text a life story and depress him right before work right? I don't wanna moan but i know that no one will  actually read this so its ok, just nice to let it all out..
Ahh i dunno, exams are getting to me and i just cba with anyone at the moment, probz due on or summin.